Killer Croc WWE HoF 2024

*"Revolution is My Name" by Pantera plays as Killer Croc came out, entered the ring over the top in his suit, and hugged his son who had just given the induction speech. After getting an ovation from the Philadelphia crowd before taking the podium and flashing his ring, Waylon Jones waited for the crowd to calm down.*

"You know, I gotta talk to Triple H about these times, I'm usually in bed by now... And waking up to phone calls an hour later. HOW ARE WE ALL DOING TONIGHT? Mkay, I know we're usually supposed to save the catchphrases for the end of the event, but I actually haven't eaten since lunch. So I'm gonna make this quick and tell everyone things they wanted to hear, starting with the GOAT of this company: Taker, I still suck at dominos, and I'm gonna have to call a rain check on the whisky til we're playing with Brian, Yoko, Jesus, and Dimebag. Kane, You truly are an inspiration, and when I was Mayor of Gotham, I'm sorry for blowing up your phone. I'm glad it all worked out and you're the Mayor of Knox County. Thanks for not calling me back on me and June's honeymoon. Savio Vega, I'm doing my best for ya buddy. You deserve a spot on this stage just like the rest of us. Dreamer, same deal. Hell, we're in Philly, you should have been the first up here. Paul Heyman, you still owe me 30 grand. Adjusted for inflation, it's more like a cool 6 figures. I'll accept payment in the form of the latest Cadillac Escalade. Cody Rhodes, I'm still not over you taking a liver kick stiff. Why the hell are you promoting a vodka when you almost needed a transplant? And lastly, to this guy (Posts THAT picture of The Rock), I'm sick of house sitting your pups in The Creek. Get your monkey ass home... And pay me royalties for the catchphrases you lifted from me. Thankfully, you didn't use the one I lifted from Chris Fronzak.

Now with that out of the way, Let's talk about me. I really do have low blood sugar right now, so I'mma make this quick. It began as me being a WCW reject then being told what just about everyone got told in the 2000s: Go to Japan, find your killer. 

...

Maybe I took that last part too seriously. BUT, I'm glad to be clean, sober, and on the right side of the law. At least long enough to be successful instead of just pure suck. From there, it was FMW, WWE, Rehab, ECW, WWE, Rehab... New Japan Pro Wrestling, Rehab... Rehab... WWE, Rehab... Church... Rehab, Church... Rehab, Church... Church... WWE... University of Florida school of Business, Church, New Japan Pro Wrestling... ONE match in AEW... My final match in New Japan.. And now the WWE Hall of Fame. Not too shabby.

I wouldn't have been here without my son Tatsu ATTEMPTING to get me on the straight and narrow, and MAYBE a certain pointy eared guardian angel in Gotham. And of course, cliche'd as it is, 2 beautiful angels named Tatsu Dominic Jones and Evangeline Victoria Jones reminding me what it means to earn a real title to be proud of, Pop Pop. Dom and Eevee, being your grandfather is my proudest accomplishment, and it will always be. 

For so long, I've been viewed as a monster, booked like a monster, feared like a monster, but all I wanted in life, and all I still want is to be human. Which is why these ain't Crocodile tears I'm crying.

And even though I'm done in a wrestling ring, I had a conversation with a certain PhD from Georgia in this very room about participation in a DIFFERENT arena in this brand, so if you ain't subscribed to Up Up Down Down, you might wanna get on top of that, cuz I got a LOT of Super Smash Brothers to play, and I want you all watching!

...  I have nothing else to say. Philly, you were awesome. WWE, thanks for this honor. And if any of y'all can make it to Croc's in Philly, space is limited, but get on the site RIGHT NOW, reserve your spot for the Omakase... It ain't cheap, but it's family, food, and fun. Cuz at Croc's we'll make you family...

And lastly, I lost a bet on the Superbowl with my grand daughter Evangeline... Who is a Swiftie... 

SO while I came in to Pantera, I'm leaving to Splatoon music. So... Enjoy Smeared Canvas...

*turns around, then looks back at the crowd*

"Oh yeah... Almost forgot... I am the kinda Croc who will NEVER settle for competence. Competent ain't enough. At the end of the day, I was, I am, and I will always be...

AS GOOD AS IT GETS!" 

*Smeared Canvas by Deep Cut blasted on the Speakers as Waylon exited the WWE ring, hugged his grandkids, and waved at the audience, a newly crowned WWE Hall of Famer.*